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Turbine is Totally the Reason Warhammer Online Failed… December 15, 2010

Posted by Wilhelm Arcturus in Dungeons & Dragons Online, entertainment, Humor, Lord of the Rings Online, Pokemon, Star Trek Online, Warhammer Online, World of Warcraft.
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Alusiphus is totally pissed at Turbine.  He hates them and the games they make.

-He hates Dungeons & Dragons Online, which is too complex.

-He hates Lord of the Rings Online, which is a total WoW copy grind fest.

-He hates Warhammer Online, because it is boring and totally not worth it.

-And he hates that Turbine is making a Warhammer 40K MMORPG.

Hrmm… about those last two Alusiphus….

I hate to break up a good rant with annoying details, but Turbine is totally not in the picture when it comes to Warhammer of any flavor.  EA Mythic messed up the first one, and I believe it is THQ that is in the process of messing up the second.

Alusiphus hates other games.  He hates Star Trek Online, for example, and Final Fantasy XIV.

He seems to have no opinion on Asheron’s Call, but since Turbine made it, I think we can guess where he’d go with that.

On the bright side, he does seem to like World of Warcraft and Pokemon.  You have to give him that.

If you aren’t getting your USDA recommended daily allowance of bile and rants, you should go read his blog.  But remember, small doses are best.

Comments»

1. Genda - December 15, 2010

Please tell me that you don’t read that blog. lol

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2. Wilhelm2451 - December 15, 2010

I have the wordpress.com feed for the Lord of the Rings Online tag in Google Reader. Anybody uses that tag on wordpress.com, it shows up.

This morning, this showed up.

The tag feeds at wordpress.com are a hugely underrated feature, in my opinion. I’ve found a lot of interesting things via those feeds.

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3. Genda - December 15, 2010

That’s cool, I haven’t used that yet. /delve into that.

BTW, that’s one angry gamer over there.

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4. Toldain - December 15, 2010

I just read that. Wow. Here’s my summary:

“I am stupid. I am too stupid to understand D&D or DDO. I am too stupid to figure out which company made Warhammer. How dare Turbine make games that remind me that I am stupid! Smart people are fanboys, and I am the one true MMO player. All MMO’s should be designed to let me kill as many things as possible as quickly as possible, with no chance of failure. The only thing that an MMO ought to reward is hours in front of the keyboard, and manic intensity.”

There’s only one correct response to rants like this: “Can I have your stuff?”

(Apparently I’m feeling cranky this morning.)

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5. Wilhelm2451 - December 15, 2010

Plus his hardcore rant cred is totally spoiled by the fact that he has the seasonal snow option turned on for his blog.

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6. Roger - December 15, 2010

I can’t determine whether the guy’s a troll or not. If he is, I fell for it and commented. Turbine made Warhammer? He needs to turn in his fake gaming journalism credentials right now.

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7. Featured on TAGN!~ Totally forgot about the Mythic Thing. Oopsies! « Envelia Rising - December 15, 2010

[...] My random blog of rant was posted on The Angry Gaming Noob’s website, to where he pointed out a flaw in my rant. To that, I [...]

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8. alusiphus - December 15, 2010

A Winner is You!

http://envelia-rising.com/2010/12/15/featured-on-tagn-totally-forgot-about-the-mythic-thing-oopsies/

Thanks for the comments, guys. I love your input.

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9. Jacob - December 15, 2010

Looks like you scared him – he took down his LOTR post and replaced it with a post saying “this is my blog and I love that people read me / I hate that people dare to post comments disagreeing with me. HOW DARE YOU.”

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10. Wilhelm2451 - December 15, 2010

See, totally not a troll… or something.

I only really found this amusing because the comment thread on EALouse is still getting a new addition once a day or so and I thought this post would have fit in quite nicely. It is certainly more logical than a lot of what gets posted in that thread.

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11. SynCaine - December 15, 2010

Facts ruin so many good rants… It’s a shame really.

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12. SynCaine - December 15, 2010

Um, and fail at reading his blog. Right at the top:

“A story of dubious accuracy”

Guy is just playing his part.

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13. Roger - December 15, 2010

I DID notice that, and it was part of what caused me confusion as to whether or not it was a troll. Taken with Alusiphus’ response and retraction would seem to indicate that the two are coincidental though.

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14. SynCaine - December 15, 2010

And, for the triple post win, having actually read his post, it’s top notch.

From defining MMORPGs (and not MMOs) as something just below WoW in complexity, to the countless factual errors, to actually getting a few things right (WAR pre and post lvl 10), to just ultimately not making a point beyond, I think, complex games are not fun (but MMORPGs are, because, um, they are generally simple?), it’s an awesome post.

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15. scotth - December 15, 2010

You had my hopes up for 40k there for a second.

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16. Gallaria - December 16, 2010

@SynCaine – I almost fell off my chair laughing at your “Facts ruin so many good rants… It’s a shame really.”

Could almost hear Jeeves/Stephen Fry saying it as one of his admonishments to Bertie Wooster.

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