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Question of the Day – What Will Lord British’s Sith Name Be? September 28, 2012

Posted by Wilhelm Arcturus in Casual Games, entertainment, Humor, Quote of the Day.
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The more I think about this, the more the Anakin Skywalker / Richard Garriott de Cayeux parallel fits.

So here we are.  As I posted yesterday, Lord British acknowledges that Zynga is evil, or at least really annoying.  And since they are annoying not only purpose, but to their own material benefit, how does one distinguish that from evil? (See Tobold definition.)  And what is the Lord British response?

I’ll use this knowledge for good!

Knowing the truth, and even acknowledging it publicly and repeatedly, Lord British has still partnered with, and has been accepted as the apprentice of, a card carrying Sith Lord, the man who has admitted in the past that the ends clearly justify the mediocre means (the ends being increasing his wealth and power, as opposed to, say, making good games), Darth Pincus.

(Not to be confused with Greg Pincus, though the methods may sound similar.)

In the words of Lord British, when reflecting on the evil of Zynga:

Yet, it’s still really important to learn those lessons, and there’s no better place to learn them then by having Zynga as a partner.

Holy crap!

As a rabid consumer of crap science fiction and fantasy in my youth… and my relative youth… and, well, into middle age frankly… I know that this can only end one way.

Offensive monetization strategy? Sounds great!

So the immediate next question for me is, what name will Darth Pincus bestow upon his new apprentice?

And here is where things get a bit fuzzy, as the whole Sith naming structure is pretty opaque to me.  Do they have some deeper meaning?  Are they some sort of subtle mockery of their past, pre-Sith life?  Are they just supposed to sound badass so as to strike fear into their enemies and make it easier for movie goers to figure out who the bad guy really is when they are off screen?

So I can only guess how Lord British will be restyled once his transformation has begun.

Darth BritanniaVille?

Darth CosPlay?

Darth SoyuzVille?

What do you think it will be.  Who will rise up to cast down Darth Pincus and redeem our misguided hero?  And will George Lucas get involved somehow and screw the whole thing up?

This whole thing needs a web comic or something.  And a better version of Darth Vader’s head pasted on Lord British.  I was short on time before work this morning.

Comments»

1. HarbingerZero - September 28, 2012

Darth Garrote would be a nice play on words. Though there is something terribly humorous about just calling him Darth British.

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2. Wilhelm Arcturus - September 28, 2012

@HZ – There is some merit in simply being Darth British after having been Lord British and then General British. But it kind of breaks the Sith model, such that it is, where the past life is hidden by the new name.

For example, we have no idea who the human being was who eventually became Darth Pincus.

But whatever we come up with here is likely to be how I refer to Lord British going forward. At least until he is redeemed.

And, in a side note, if you Google “Darth Pincus” only TAGN shows up. I cannot be the first. Has the dark side silenced others before me?

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3. Aufero - September 28, 2012

Darth Mondain. After all, the first Ultima game featured time travel.

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4. Varakkys - September 28, 2012

Darth Cadeaux

Yeah, that’s right – he feels your presents

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5. Wilhelm Arcturus - September 28, 2012

@Varakkys – OMG that is horrible! And a play on the addition to his name as well as a possible tie in to his ultimate collector social game. I like it!

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6. Telwyn - September 28, 2012

Darth Britannicus

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7. bhagpuss - September 28, 2012

Darth Tagn, the Force Musketeer. Oh wait, that would be your Sith name…

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8. Wilhelm Arcturus - September 28, 2012

I did find a Sith Name Generator, but anything that coughs up something like “Darth Blaspuption” is clearly not taking the war seriously any more.

And then there is the one that came up with Darth Competent when I put in Richard Garriott. That isn’t getting my vote.

@Bhagpuss – I’d like to think my Sith name would be Darth Canopus, as it is a star in the constellation with Arcturus. But it sounds a bit too much like Darth Cantaloupe if you aren’t listening closely.

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9. SynCaine - September 28, 2012

That Tobold link is as hilarious today as it was then. Although I did forget about the little green man’s “what about me guyz?” comment. Gold.

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