Quitting Eternal Skirmish?

Lore Sjöberg‘s Bad Gods site has a parody of MMO exit surveys up today.

Well, not a parody of just any MMO exit survey.  As Lore says,

I’m recently returning to playing Warcraft after the 3.2 update. If you’ve ever tried to quit Warcraft — and you should, it’s an integral part of the complete experience — you’ll see that the subscription cancellation form does its best to cajole, argue, and guilt trip you into staying.

He isn’t kidding.  On the account management page, attached to the link to the page to cancel your subscription, is this plea:

You can use this link to terminate your subscription online. Before you do so, we would love to hear from you by telephone. There are many steps that our representatives can take to address any problems you may be experiencing. Please call us at 1-800-59-BLIZZARD (800-592-5499).

Call us!  Don’t just leave mad!

And that is before they really start in on you.

Anyway, be sure to actually select items from the “Why you’re leaving” drop down list of the parody.  There is even a response in there to soothe Tipa’s concerns.

6 thoughts on “Quitting Eternal Skirmish?

  1. Rakanishu

    I am happy to say that I have been clean for the last 3 years. I Uninstalled and broke the CDs in half. Although I heard Blizzard is going to be peddling something new.. I think they called it Diablo 3? (taps wrist to find a vein)

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  2. Keystone

    I don’t mind answering a “reason for leaving” when I cancel; what I do not like, however, is the *requirement* to call for cancelation, and then getting the 3rd degree over the phone from someone you can hardly understand and is obviously reading talking points from their screen.

    *cough TSO cough*

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  3. Wilhelm2451 Post author

    Well, I wouldn’t call it a requirement. More of a desperate plea. And what are they going to do for me if I call up and say that my system crashes every time I go to Dalaran? Will they put a dev on the phone? Will they have some unique insight into the issue? No, they’ll read from a list of things I’ve already tried.

    I will bet that the agent you speak with, should you call, has a list of incentives to offer in order to get you to stay, up to and including a free month of play. You probably have to be very grumpy to get the whole month though.

    You should look into that cough. Fortunately I’m pretty well inoculated against that sort of thing these days.

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  4. Marcus Hamilton

    This is a little off topic but I quit WoW once and found it to be moderately annoying then I tired to quit EVE. I logged into the website, and on the main account page there is a prominent button labeled “cancel account” which loaded a very minimal page with a comments section, a reason dropdown with “I decline to state” already selected and a single confirm button that took me directly to a simple “your account has been canceled” confirmation message.

    It literally took 3 seconds not counting the ten second I stood jaw agape wondering what alternate universe I was in where not giving people money is this easy.

    Eve has a very high recidivism rate. I’m back, now with two accounts. I think small part of that is not giving people a bad taste in their mouths on their way out. I have no plans to play WoW ever again.

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  5. Sören

    AFAIR the link in Eve account management to the cancellation servie is labeled “Need a break from Eve?” – They obviously know (or have read the related nerfbat-posting) that one more likely comes back when one can quit without feeling guilty.

    Same thing with ISPs, mobile phones etc. When my ISP first offered virtual servers, I had to cancel my old plain web space because there was no upgrade option. So I had to fill a webform to get a download link to some fax form to be sent and then to be called by some call center agent.

    And Blizzard did finally loose me as a returning customer when they were unable to tell me in time (of the 10 day WotLK trial) that I shall not ask account service but a GM to restore my old lvl 70 toon…

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  6. Pingback: West Karana » Daily Blogroll 8/7 — Band Camp edition

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