Some People REALLY Want to be Goons…

I mean, really, really badly.   Such is the case for Prencleeve Grothsmore, resident of New Eden.

Thanks to Gaff for sending this to me.

The whole thread starts off innocuously enough… he sounds like he just got landed in a Goon recruiting scam, and even *I* have gotten those… and then a few pages in, it gets weird.

Welcome to EVE Online.

7 thoughts on “Some People REALLY Want to be Goons…

  1. Mika Hirvonen (@Hirvox)

    People who join Something Awful just to try to join Goonwaffe are fairly frequent, but they’re rarely this stubborn. He even understood what J4G meant and tried to bypass it by paying an older SA member to impersonate him and fool the automated system. But if you post that scam offer to Something Awful forums with your original account, it doesn’t take much Internet detective work to figure it out.

    The thread does have some good points on what credibility is in Eve. There’s a lot of crooks, but unlike mr. Prencleeve Grothsmore, they don’t even try to whitewash their main persona.


  2. flosch

    I’m not sure I fully get it. But I guess the gist is that someone wasted a lot of time and money to join the Goons? Many of the names they throw around don’t tell me anything, so that may be why I’m lost.

    Maybe the problem is I never could understand how somebody in their right mind would want to join the Goons. They always reminded me of those bullies in school that would squeeze the lunch money out of the younger kids and then beat them up afterwards anyway.

    Sandboxes are great ideas, but they’re not my cup of tea if they’re full of that kind of people.. reason I gave up on Eve in the end.


  3. Raelyf

    Goons aren’t so bad. They just play the game their way. Having them screw you out of some ISK is much less like having someone beat you up and steal your lunch money and much more like having your queen taken in a chess game. Sure, it’s much easier to get emotionally invested in EVE – but it’s still just a game. Say what you like about them, but Goons in EVE force you to react; they’re effectively an endless source of content.

    Like any large group of people, EVE has all kinds. It shouldn’t be hard to find people you like and identify with, and treat the rest of the players as content. That’s the point of an online sandbox, after all.


  4. Mika Hirvonen (@Hirvox)

    The appeal of the Goons in the eyes of the general Eve population is rather simple: People like to be a part of something big and preferably on the winning side. CCP’s marketing has also done it’s part to tout this aspect of Eve and the Goons have marketed themselves as an entity where even the newbie can make a difference. And the results speak for themselves; They do control a significant chunk of space and their antics do make headlines, no matter what they win or lose. A perfect entity to join, right?-) Wrong.

    What the general Eve population fails to realize that Goon propaganda and marketing is mostly internal; Both to keep existing members’ morale up and to attract recruits from within the greater Something Awful community. The occasions when they’ve recruited from the general Eve population are very few, very exceptional and usually had a significant period of cultural cross-pollination to back it up.


  5. SynCaine

    That was amazing. Towards the end I suspected he was actually trolling the Goons, but then you consider all the ISK, and it’s pretty clear he was serious all along.


  6. HarbingerZero

    I read the thread. I have that feeling where I just watched a really deep movie. And I feel like I caught what was going on on the surface, and it was mildly entertaining. But that the real meat and potatoes eluded me. Perhaps with another reading…nah.


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